Research of 1,000 men found 19% find it easier to reveal their emotions written down than they do in person. Fear of embarrassment (42%), feeling awkward (39%) and nervousness about looking weak (30%), were among the main reasons for this.
It also emerged partners are the people men feel most comfortable opening up to, but dads and colleagues are the hardest to have a meaningful chat with. And the top reasons why they find it hard to open up to their father include ‘the fact he doesn’t express his feelings to me’ (42%) and that ‘we’ve never had a deep meaningful conversation before’ (42%).
The research was commissioned by Hallmark , which has teamed up with men’s suicide prevention charity ANDY’S MAN CLUB, to launch a unique collection of Father’s Day cards carefully crafted to convey messages of love, appreciation and understanding.
Andrew Dewhirst, senior writer for Hallmark, said: “As millions prepare to celebrate paternal figures across the UK, the calendar date also offers an opportunity to redefine the meaning behind the heartfelt messages we send to dads. Men can find it challenging to open up because society has conditioned them to believe that vulnerability is a sign of weakness, which came out as one of the top reasons in our research.”
“However, embracing vulnerability is a courageous act that can lead to authentic connections and emotional well-being. Sometimes the simplest gesture – a card filled with love, appreciation and understanding – can become pathways for crucial conversations, especially for fathers who may find it difficult to open up.”
Other reasons men don’t want to express their feelings include being seen as a burden (26%) or being made fun of (19%). Nearly one in four (23%) fear they wouldn’t be able to articulate their emotions properly by speaking out loud. And 13% simply don’t want others to see them cry.
Nearly four in 10 (39%) admit if they were to express their feelings to another man, it would make them feel ‘weak’. But of those who do take that step, 28% felt relieved, 25% felt better overall and 17% became more relaxed.
The number-one topic men wish they could open up about was their mental health, followed by physical health issues and feeling lonely. While others are concerned about financial worries, physical insecurities or how to cope when someone hurts their feelings.
Three quarters of those polled via OnePoll, however, consider it important that men have spaces where they can express their feelings with no judgement. Furthermore, a third (34%) weren’t surprised to hear suicide is the biggest cause of death in men under the age of 50. However, 58% aren’t aware of any charities they can reach out to for support if they need it.
Luke Ambler, co-founder and chair from Andy’s Man Club, where men can find a local support group , or be involved in the conversation online using #ANDYSMANCLUB, added: “For men, opening up can feel like stepping into uncharted territory, but it’s in these moments of vulnerability that true growth and connection occur.”
“When men allow themselves to feel and express their emotions, they may discover a newfound sense of freedom and inner peace. To encourage more men to open up – however they feel comfortable – more safe spaces are needed where men can start to explore this.”