Netherlands v England: Euro 2024 semi-final – live | Euro 2024

A reminder of the teams as they take the field

“Whenever there’s talk of golden generations, I’m prone to recalling the Scottish side of my schooldays,” says Geoff Wignall. “Some of the names might not resonate much with you young folk, but they had the likes of Tommy Gemmell and John Neill in defence, Dave Mackay, Jim Baxter, Billy Bremner and Pat Crerand for the midfield, Jimmy Johnstone and Charlie Cooke for the wings with latterly Eddie Grey also and Ian St John and Alan Gilzean inside them. And Denis Law.

“I’ll just say that again for emphasis: and Denis Law. That’s at least half a dozen players of genuine world class plus an all-time great – England don’t have that – and they couldn’t even qualify for a tournament. Southgate deserves plenty of credit.”

England’s major semi-finals to date

The mood around the England team feels so much more positive than it did before the Switzerland game. It might be time to fire up the ITSCOMINGHOMOMETER™ to get an official reading.

Before the match, why not read – and sign up to – our free, funny*, football newsletter.

Look at his face, etc.

He may be the squad’s most expensive – and youngest – player but he was heavily criticised afterwards, including for his facial expressions.

That biblical rainfall has had an impact on the pitch. On ITV, Karen Carney says it was cutting up slightly when players were twisting and turning during the warm-up

It’s the sign of a good side that they can play modestly and win, as England did against Slovakia and Switzerland. But you can only get away with a dodgy pitch:paper ratio for so long.

Ronald Koeman’s pre-match thoughts

[On the Yellow Wall turning orange] We knew we’d have big support in this tournament – it’s great for us, but the match will be decided between the white lines.

We need space in front and Malen is a player who goes deep; he’s fast. We want to get one-against-one on both sides.

There are critics in every nation. Maybe they haven’t played to the level people in England expected, but the results are good and they know they can play better.

It’s important for us to have good possession and get the right players between the lines. We need the wingers, and the full-backs… we need the perfect game.

1988 is a long time ago. In Holland we need another win! Let’s hope we’ll do it this season.

“I’m struggling to find a suitable vehicle for a Keane/Wright buddy movie,” says Charles Antaki. “There’s almost always some kind of non-PC asymmetry between the characters – I forget who plays alongside Bruce Willis in the Die Hard franchise, but he’s meant to be a nincompoop of some kind; Batman and Robin, Holmes and Watson, Poirot and Hastings – no, nothing in that genre works.

“The Hopper/Fonda duo in Easy Rider is a bit better but there aren’t much laughs there. So has to be Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid, reimagining Butch as a stern evangelical preacher and the Kid a streetwise hustler with a social conscience. Of course there we’ve fallen deep into the land of stereotypes, but isn’t that what buddy movies are all about anyway?”

Could we at least stretch to Celebrity Gogglebox?

Rob Smyth is back! He will build the excitement once more.

That game was against Salford City, who included Luke Humbles in their lineup. United lost 4-3.

How’s the weather in Dortmund?

Gabriel Clarke is doing one of his classy features on Jordan Pickford. The goalkeeper has played for Darlington, Burton, Alfreton and Bradford in his career. It is always a nice reminder how important the football pyramid has been for England. Lots of players have experience down the leagues.

Time for a break ahead of what could be a long night. Will Unwin will keep you abreast of any developments.

Gareth Southgate’s pre-match thoughts

At 19 years, 82 days, Kobbie Mainoo will become the youngest player to appear in a semi-final for England

Unless you’re watching particularly closely, it’s not immediately obvious what Mainoo has been doing out there. He hasn’t scored or assisted. He doesn’t have lung-busting pace or an urge to unveil his entire box of tricks. Indeed, the very lack of ostentation is the point. For decades English football has possessed central midfielders who see their role as a canvas, never content with one touch where three touches will do, dissatisfied with their possession unless they have done something eye-catching. Desperate, above all, to be seen.

Mainoo, by contrast, wants to disappear. There are of course flourishes there: a wicked long shot, the deadly spin and run that took two Swiss players out of the game on Saturday night, allowing him to stride 45 yards up the middle of the pitch. But most of his game is about combination play. Bringing others into the game. Drawing defenders towards him and making space elsewhere.

“Everyone talks about a great generation of attacking English players, and to a certain extent it’s true,” writes David Wall. “Unfortunately it’s not true in a way that helps create a coherent starting XI as most of them like to play in the same area of the pitch. It’s an irony Alanis Morrisette would appreciate – Southgate has 10,000 forwards who like to play in the space behind the striker when all he needs is a deep midfield who can circulate the ball.

“Of course, the real villain in all this is Pep Guardiola for ruining Kalvin Phillips. Imagine if Phillips had developed like most players do when they move to City. By now he’d be England’s version of Tony Kroos or Rodri but instead he’s more like Danny Drinkwater after his move to Chelsea.”

Kudos for writing all that without recourse to the words ‘Lampard’ and ‘Gerrard’.

“I’ve no dog in this fight, Rob,” says Simon McMahon, “and I like Southgate a lot, may the best team win, hopefully after a great game, but is it cowardly to start with Kane?”

Arf, very good, even if 99.94 per cent of the football crowd won’t have a clue what you’re talking about.

Declan Rice: These are the moments you live for

“The Roy and Wrighty Show is pretty funny…” writes Stephen Berkery. “But, if you don’t speak French, Spanish, Italian, are you entitled to an opinion on how to win international tournaments?”

If you haven’t been an ITV pundit, are you entitled to an opinion on their opinion? Am I entitled to an opinion on your opinion of their opinion?

Netherlands team news: Malen starts

England team news: Guehi starts, Shaw on the bench

XXVI is the new XI

This is pretty fascinating

“With the Test match going into extra time at Lord’s, I’m not sure I’ll make it back to Tooting in time for the kick off,” writes Gary Naylor. “The thing is – I’m not sure I want to, such will be the rack on which hopes will be stretched. Is it cowardly to pray for no trains?”

Too niche for the football crowd, Shirley.

The F-word

Ian Wright and Roy Keane are squabbling affectionately on ITV. They’re a brilliant double act who need their own buddy movie asap.

“As well as the official Dutch anthem, could we have a blast of the unofficial Dutch tournament anthem, Links Rechts, please?” writes Andy Gordon. “It’s the kind of tune I can imagine 16 year-olds bouncing around to, unless they are busy launching parabolic pearlers against France.”

I hadn’t heard it until about two minutes, but now Doop feels like a golden age of Dutch music.

ENGLAND’S DREAMS ALL COME TRUE

Here’s the great David Lacey’s report from that giddy night at Wembley in June 1996.

History lesson

• 1988 Netherlands 3-1 England

• 1996 England 4-1 Netherlands (poor old Scotland)

England fans attacked in Dortmund

“I had an interesting conversation with a pack of Dutch bikers outside a Scottish castle at the start of the Euros,” boasts Justin Kavanagh. “I poked them, perhaps unwisely, about relying on the Big Man to pull them through against Poland and relying on Wout One football.

“The orange-bedecked crew glared at me and one of them grunted that if Germany can win ugly for decades, it’s ‘our time now to do it with brute force’. Although I wanted to argue that it didn’t work against Spain in 2010, I didn’t disagree. Young Mr. Bellingham and co. might be in for a bruising evening.”

That was a different type of brute force: the clog. This is its pure-spirited cousin, Total Woutball.

Team news/speculation

England are expected to make only one change, with Marc Guehi, available after suspension, replacing Ezri Konsa.

Netherlands could bring in Donyell Malen for Steven Bergwijn.

Possible England team (3-4-2-1) Pickford; Walker, Stones, Guehi; Saka, Mainoo, Rice, Trippier; Foden, Bellingham; Kane.

Possible Netherlands team (4-2-3-1) Verbruggen; Dumfries, De Vrij, Van Dijk, Ake; Schouten, Reijnders; Malen/Bergwijn, Simons, Gakpo; Depay.

The Dumfries Protocol may sound like an orgulous post-punk band from the early 1980s. But they’re not, and they don’t have a capital P either.

There are reports of fighting in a Dortmund pub, though it sounds like the day has been largely peaceful. And loud.

There goes the fear…

This is England’s third major semi-final in six years. Before that they’d managed four since 1950, so it definitely constitutes progress.

Preamble