Justin Baldoni Confesses To Having ‘Near Breakdown’ On ‘It Ends With Us’ Set

Justin Baldoni says directing and starring in “It Ends With Us” was a nearly untenable job.

The titular adaptation of Colleen Hoover’s novel follows flower shop owner Lily Bloom (Blake Lively) as she becomes romantically involved with abusive neurosurgeon Riley Kincaid (Baldoni), which made for volatile subject matter that deeply affected Baldoni.

The actor confessed on Wednesday’s episode of the “How to Fail with Elizabeth Day” podcast that helming the project was “a very lonely job” due to the two-pronged task of also starring in it and recalled having a “near breakdown” after one particular scene.

“There’s a moment in the movie where Ryle finds Lily’s phone, and he finds a phone number and he’s very jealous and he’s heartbroken and he’s angry,” Baldoni said on the podcast. “And he doesn’t harm her, but you can see in his eyes how dangerous he is.”

He continued, “After that scene, I had a near breakdown. And I had to leave and just cry and shake because there was so much pain.”

Baldoni went on to share that he was emotionally abused by an ex-girlfriend in college and “experienced sexual trauma in that relationship,” and kept it short after noting he was “hoping to save myself for marriage” — but that “lines can be crossed” unwillingly.

“It Ends With Us” went on to gain attention after Lively approached its subject matter with an oddly incongruent attitude during the press tour, notably dismissing a reporter’s question about fans who are able to relate to the domestic violence theme.

She also spent much of the press tour promoting her beverage company and hair care line.

While the blowback went viral on social media, few were unaware that Baldoni struggled during production. He said Wednesday that “there were times when I was actually just shaking,” as playing the abusive Kincaid while also having to direct the film was exhausting.

“In your moments of quiet, everybody has a thousand questions for you, and also nobody wants to disturb you and you don’t really have many people to talk to and you can’t necessarily share your anxiety … because you’re also the leader,” Baldoni explained. The actor revealed he “had dreams as [Kincaid] for a while” after shooting and that it “took a few months” for the character to leave his mind.

Ultimately, the film was a box office success as “It Ends With Us” went on to gross $350 million worldwide.

Need help? Visit RAINN’s National Sexual Assault Online Hotline or the National Sexual Violence Resource Center’s website.